Tag Archives: grandparents

Marking Milestones

Long View: Making the Most of Milestones

As a culture, we recognize milestones. We count the years with class reunions, wedding anniversaries, or years logged since a cancer diagnosis. It has been a few months, but I bet the majority of readers can tell me how many years it had been since the Chicago Cubs had last won the World Series.

As parents, we carefully record that first step, first tooth, first time rolling over. At least we do for the first baby; the second, third, fourth… maybe not quite as detailed. This month, I’m celebrating a birthday that ends in a 9.  This is a milestone in a way, a preamble to a new decade. To be completely honest, it’s more about clinging to the final year left in my current decade.

My sons had a great-grandfather who was meticulous in keeping track of each great-grandchild’s birthday. He carried a pocket calendar around and recorded every date in his precious, shaky handwriting, making sure to not miss a single date for each of his 12 great-grandkids. It was so touching to me, and I made sure to never miss that World War II veteran’s birthday either.

Today we are reminded of birthdays and anniversaries through social media. Facebook has made me a much better friend because I never would have put all of those dates into a traditional calendar. I could not keep up with sending something as old-fashioned as a card via something as truly antiquated as the mail. With just a few clicks, I can send a birthday cake emoji with a couple of exclamation points through cyberspace and am on top of things.

Some milestones can be bittersweet, like the first holiday after a grandmother passes away or a 75th wedding anniversary that never happened because one of the spouses is no longer with us. I toasted the 100th birthday of my grandmother even though she left us at 94 years old.

Do you reach out to your elderly family and friends when special dates pop up on the calendar?  These dates don’t have to be completely solemn occasions. Reaching out to remember a wedding anniversary with a widower can bring back happy memories of a beautiful marriage, not to mention the fact that you have taken the time to call or visit with this person and recognize the importance of the day.

You may not want to just send an emoji to your great grandmother. Take the time to send a card and handwritten note or better yet, stop by for a visit.

Can you imagine how you would feel at 29, 39, or 49 if your important milestone wasn’t important to anyone else?  Someone 79, 89, or 99 feels exactly the same way.

Here is an idea. This February, make an elder your valentine.

Lora Felger is a community and broker liaison at Health Alliance. She is the mother of 2 terrific boys, a world traveler, and a major Iowa State Cyclones fan.

Reliving Summers Past

Long View: Summer Memories

It’s been quite a summer hasn’t it? We’ve faced state budget issues, unreliable weather, and rising prices every time we turn around. By the way, when will we be done with the ragweed pollen? There seems to be a never-ending parade of things to worry about, and I’m worn out.

This summer does not fit with my memories of my favorite season. My main worries used to be how to get the frisbee off the roof and finding the next bag of Fritos. It seems I didn’t have much to worry about. But wait a minute, I was a kid, so it was my parents’ job to worry.

My mom and dad would leave my younger brother and me at my grandparents’ farm for a couple of weeks in the summer, and we had a great time. We were a little spoiled, to say the least, and at the time, I felt like we had no rules.

We could eat anything we wanted, as long as we cleaned up our plates at mealtime. We could stay up as late as we wanted, but we usually turned in early because we were exhausted from playing all day. We could go wherever we wanted on their property, as long as there was a grown-up or older cousin within shouting distance. Best of all, we could watch as much TV as we wanted, but there always seemed to be too many distractions on a working farm.

The day before my parents would come to pick us up, our grandfather would take us into town for haircuts at the same barbershop he had used since the Great Depression. The morning of my parent’s arrival, we were scrubbed and polished, from our fingernails and neck to our ears, and dressed in our traveling clothes. It was hard to leave, but I think we were ready to get back to our routines, our friends, and the start of the school year.

One of the nicest parts about talking to our Medicare members is hearing their memories. I think the stories and experiences they share enrich us and give us a better perspective on the present. Try asking an older family member or friend about their favorite summer. I bet you get a smile and hear a wonderful story from their past.

Looking back, maybe this wasn’t such a bad summer after all. There might even be kids today who will look back on the summer of 2016 as the best one they can remember.

Patrick Harness is a community liaison with a long history of experience in health insurance. If you ask him to pick a color, he always chooses orange, and he is known for his inability to parallel park.